Maybe “space cadet’ shouldn’t be considered an insult…

We at MANVIL can’t profess to be the most travelled souls on the planet. Sure, we’ve enjoyed some pretty wonderful treks, seen a few beautiful places, and met some really great folks, but we don’t fly for a living.

That said, we know a few folks who do travel a lot, and on the last several jaunts out and about this great nation and beyond we’ve all noticed a somewhat disturbing trend: Carry-ons as big as tractor tires jammed in and about the cabin overheads.

Sure there are those silly things at the gates that will give you an idea whether your carry on will fit in the overhead, but they’re rarely used. And when they are, the flier at hand is usually glassy eyed and standing on their recently unpacked baggage.

Curiously proud and atop the dreaded “carry on baggage guide” they plead to the staff at the gate.

“See, it fits!” They’ll state, in a weepy tone with their most favoured worldly possessions strewn out around the baggage crammed sizing contraption. The gate staff shake their heads at the soon to be carry-on-less passenger. Now the bag-less faces will flow emotions that will run the gamut from disgruntled and confused to still drunk and blurrily resentful.

A purse, a fanny pack, OK. A briefcase or a small back-pack, we can agree with. But a duffel bag the size of manatees midsection? Get the hell out of here. That’s why we’re proposing this to the good people at Virgin America, who are opening a new flight path from LAX, and SFO to Portland’s PDX: Keep Calm: No Carry On.

If the gal at check-in can’t lift it above her head with ease… it goes underneath. You’re flying Virgin America, hayseed. If you need a big bag to prove your worth, you’ve chosen the wrong airline. Virgin isn’t a cattle car, nor is it a school bus. This, sir/madam, is a limo in the sky for beautiful people to mingle in. It has nothing to do with punching nylon into an overhead until it fits.

We are a luxuriously appointed staff, crew and cabin that make getting from point A to point B a delight… and carrying a bag through the airport, any airport, is not luxurious. So leave the bags to us, enjoy the flight and we’ll let you have your baggage back when you leave. We’re kinda like the psychiatrist in the sky you know you’ve needed for a long, long time.

Of course there are drawbacks for MANVIL in this plan… we’d need to win BIG with the good folks at Poker.dk in order to afford that grand flight to the UK this summer! But it never hurts to dream, does it Sir Richard.

 


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